Successive generations find similar feelings but you have written well and thoughtfully about them. She charts her own course and, trying to aim and focus it as you may have done, only fate will justly claim the blame or credit. Relax! Enjoy another star as she joins our galaxy.
We too have passed that gate. Our two daughters are in college, entering senior and sophomore years respectively. But it is far more like the aid station at mile 80 than tape at a finish line. The race takes a unique shape in the quiet at night. Their challenges become more nebulous and start mirroring some you have either never answered or addressed for yourself. There will be times when you question how will this race turn out. A simple boo boo bandaid won’t suffice.
But then another dawn will break, a second (or third or forth) wind will hit and she (along with you) will hit a stride you didn’t know was there and she will soar beyond what you dreamed. At mile 90 the valleys and peaks will astound.
But trust me, though the roles change (and I suppose inevitably begin to reverse), you will still be dad, there will still be advice to give (and sometimes be unheard at first), and plenty of noise. Just more metaphorical in tenor.
Ooooh, I like that 80 mile aid station metaphor! Such great insight, Charles. And congrats on two birds flying the nest! It must be REALLY quiet in your house. ;-) We still have Quinn (13), so we aren't empty nesters quite yet. But it's nice to hear we still have some miles to share as a family.
You've captured the depths of conflicting emotions so well! I hope you are prepared for the rest of your lifetime where you are never able to completely exhale again while you await the next news from her. And the next. And the next. The bonding does not end when they move away from you.
In fact, there is no end to the parent/child connection. Not something we realize at first. If I could, I would be like John (in his comment below) at this evocative moment: I would go play with my kids right now. If I could. You are half a world away, your sister is in another world, but I spent yesterday watching the your brother playing hockey with joy, on the same day he became head coach for the teen hockey league where your nephew is on his way too. AND your brother played two games himself, in between his dad duties! I can't play hockey with him, any more than I can do triathons with you -- but i can cheer and love from the sidelines!
That's so great you can be present in their lives. You get to "play with them right now", but without the required pads and mouth guard. ❤️ I'm super proud of my little brother as he explores this player/coach phase where we all know he has a unique gift...I can only imagine what this means for his Mom. 🤩
All of your grandkids are courageous explorers, physically and intellectually, always choosing to be "in the game" rather than on the sidelines. No bigger grandparent win in my book. 🙏
I remember about 10 years ago reading about your walks with her along Skyline. Seeing this makes me think about my soon to be 8 year old daughter, and puts into perspective how fast time flies.
Congrats on the milestone. I’m going to go play with my kids now.
Oldest daughter is about to start her second year at University of Oregon, just one state over. Fortunately her first year of college went really well and she's very happy with her choice of school, her roommates, and choice of major. That helps SO much!
And I'm doing fine. It took a while, but I've settled into a new normal with her little sister (now a high school senior), the dog and the cat. It's a big change! But such a great step and source of pride.
Eugene is such a nice place to visit (as is New York City!) so it gives me an excuse to visit and enjoy some running there.
Eugene is a great visit for runners! Pre's Trail, Hayward, Butte to Butte, Amazon, the UofO campus, the Willamette...glad to hear you'll get some runs in!
Wow exciting! I went to college in NYC (FIT). She’s going to have a blast! And I understand why you sprouted new grey hairs. Haha. NYC is an exciting playground for a young woman.
Successive generations find similar feelings but you have written well and thoughtfully about them. She charts her own course and, trying to aim and focus it as you may have done, only fate will justly claim the blame or credit. Relax! Enjoy another star as she joins our galaxy.
You have launched a few yourself, kids and grandkids! Must be fascinating. Plus I imagine that at good to see Sophie on that side of the pond. 😇
We too have passed that gate. Our two daughters are in college, entering senior and sophomore years respectively. But it is far more like the aid station at mile 80 than tape at a finish line. The race takes a unique shape in the quiet at night. Their challenges become more nebulous and start mirroring some you have either never answered or addressed for yourself. There will be times when you question how will this race turn out. A simple boo boo bandaid won’t suffice.
But then another dawn will break, a second (or third or forth) wind will hit and she (along with you) will hit a stride you didn’t know was there and she will soar beyond what you dreamed. At mile 90 the valleys and peaks will astound.
But trust me, though the roles change (and I suppose inevitably begin to reverse), you will still be dad, there will still be advice to give (and sometimes be unheard at first), and plenty of noise. Just more metaphorical in tenor.
Ooooh, I like that 80 mile aid station metaphor! Such great insight, Charles. And congrats on two birds flying the nest! It must be REALLY quiet in your house. ;-) We still have Quinn (13), so we aren't empty nesters quite yet. But it's nice to hear we still have some miles to share as a family.
Feeling all this deeply too. Dropping off Olivia tomorrow and Zoe on Tuesday.
Please send them our love and congratulations! And a congrats to you as well, Dad! 🙌
You've captured the depths of conflicting emotions so well! I hope you are prepared for the rest of your lifetime where you are never able to completely exhale again while you await the next news from her. And the next. And the next. The bonding does not end when they move away from you.
In fact, there is no end to the parent/child connection. Not something we realize at first. If I could, I would be like John (in his comment below) at this evocative moment: I would go play with my kids right now. If I could. You are half a world away, your sister is in another world, but I spent yesterday watching the your brother playing hockey with joy, on the same day he became head coach for the teen hockey league where your nephew is on his way too. AND your brother played two games himself, in between his dad duties! I can't play hockey with him, any more than I can do triathons with you -- but i can cheer and love from the sidelines!
Much love! Very proud of all you do.
That's so great you can be present in their lives. You get to "play with them right now", but without the required pads and mouth guard. ❤️ I'm super proud of my little brother as he explores this player/coach phase where we all know he has a unique gift...I can only imagine what this means for his Mom. 🤩
All of your grandkids are courageous explorers, physically and intellectually, always choosing to be "in the game" rather than on the sidelines. No bigger grandparent win in my book. 🙏
I remember about 10 years ago reading about your walks with her along Skyline. Seeing this makes me think about my soon to be 8 year old daughter, and puts into perspective how fast time flies.
Congrats on the milestone. I’m going to go play with my kids now.
Sophie still loves a good walk in the forest! I'm glad that stuck. Every moment matters, as you know! Crack a good dad joke for us all. 🙌
Congratulations! Going through this myself and your post captures the emotions perfectly.
Oh my gosh, how are you doing?!? Who did you send off and to where? Hopefully not an ocean in between 😇 (and congrats btw 🎉)
Thanks!
Oldest daughter is about to start her second year at University of Oregon, just one state over. Fortunately her first year of college went really well and she's very happy with her choice of school, her roommates, and choice of major. That helps SO much!
And I'm doing fine. It took a while, but I've settled into a new normal with her little sister (now a high school senior), the dog and the cat. It's a big change! But such a great step and source of pride.
Eugene is such a nice place to visit (as is New York City!) so it gives me an excuse to visit and enjoy some running there.
Eugene is a great visit for runners! Pre's Trail, Hayward, Butte to Butte, Amazon, the UofO campus, the Willamette...glad to hear you'll get some runs in!
Wow exciting! I went to college in NYC (FIT). She’s going to have a blast! And I understand why you sprouted new grey hairs. Haha. NYC is an exciting playground for a young woman.